It has been fourteen months since I wrote this post and said goodbye to blogging. At the time things were all too much and I couldn’t manage to keep up with every in my day to day life, let alone throw blogging on top of that. Whilst I gave up blogging, I still uploaded to YouTube as much as I could, yet by January this year that had pretty much stopped.
I’d like to say things have become easier since then and that is why I’ve decided to write again, but it’s not. Everything it still pretty hard going and managing chronic fatigue is definitely a challenge that most days I don’t feel I’m up to. Yet here I am.
I’m not making a plan, and I’m not committing, but I do feel very lost and lonely in this life – at home in bed a lot of the time with little to keep me company, and I have missed writing. I find it helps me process with things and I also want to be able to share my life in some form or another, even if it is only for me or the children to look back on one day.
So here I am, tapping my fingers on the keys, trying to get my words out of my stuffed up head. Whilst my CFS therapist disagrees, this year has felt like one of the worst I can remember and it really gets me down. I have spent far too many hours in bed, sleeping or just wishing for it so I can get away from trying to cope. This blog will see a change too as I move away from parenting two little children to being a mum of more independent and grown children and wanting to share more about my own life. I am hoping to talk about mental health and chronic illness by sharing my own journey but also offering any advice and support I may have to offer others in a similar situation.
I hope those of you who are old-time friends are still around to say hello to and to anyone who is new to me or my blog, hello! I promise to try and be upbeat as much as I can, but sometimes you just have to be truthful.